Being a mommy really is the best, most rewarding, and most exhausting job in the entire world. I wouldn’t trade motherhood for anything in the world. Even when I am away from my babies at my “day job,” I miss them like crazy. But I do have to admit I love using my “adult brain” too. It took me a while to be able to say that out loud without feeling guilty, like I was neglecting my babies, but I know I am a hard worker, and I am probably a better mommy as a working mommy.
But don’t get me wrong, I was once a stay-at-home mommy too, and it was wonderful. So in today’s day and age, woman have it pretty tough. We are looked down upon if we do work, as if we are neglecting our babies; but then if we do choose to stay home, people wonder what we do all day. And having been on both sides of that fence and I can say from experience … all we do is work, non-stop at both jobs.
But there are those times that mommies just need to get away and collect ourselves, our thoughts, and our sanity. And I don’t mean by escaping to the office, I mean … getting away from life, from reality and just putting ourselves back together so we can continue putting one foot in front of the other instead of spinning in circles.
What we really do during “alone time”:
1). A whole lot of drooling … our brains have been working so fast and are so overloaded with noise, toys, “Mommy” being shouted all day, and demands at work … we sit there and drool on ourselves out of pure insanity.
2). A lot of nothing … when I am in my car alone, I discover that I may have driven almost 30 miles before I realize that my radio is OFF! The silence is golden. You would think it would be deafening, but it is subconsciously desired.
3). SLEEP! All we really want to do is sleep when we are alone. But I have found that I still manage to interrupt my own sleep even if I’m not at home or the kids are away. Something manages to wake me up in the middle of the night or I wake up early, for no apparent reason.
4). Go blank … you would think that when you have alone time, you would take the time to think about the things that YOU have been wanting to do, or to accomplish, but no … your mind actually shuts off, and goes blank for a while.
5). Organize your life … when I find myself in a kid-free zone I try to get a head of the game. I clean out my fridge, I straighten my pantry and I even wash and vacuum my car out to try and get the two years of ground in fruit gummies and raisins out of my floor board. I know it doesn’t really sound glamorous, but that’s what we do.
6). Movies or books … when we have a chance to get away or hide, we usually go see a movie in a theater that we haven’t been able to do in three years, or actually sit down and finish a book, that we haven’t been able to do since high school.
7). And the one thing that we do the most when we are by ourselves is … BREATHE. We enjoy the fact that no one is asking anything of us, that we aren’t asking anyone to do something (like a chore or homework) and we can actually just sit there, not saying a word and quite possibly staring at a blank wall for no apparent reason.
8). We imagine … we pretend we are in some far away land, drinking wine, being fed grapes while being fanned by some really young Cabana boy, all the while you are curled up in your sweats, no makeup, and loving every minute of it without judgment. Or you are in a land of chocolate, where your jeans are never too tight, your hair always looks perfect and you are at your ideal weight for the rest of your life and scales no longer exist.
And then those few fleeting moments of “alone time” are over and you are back on duty as mommy! You wouldn’t trade it for the world, but it’s those few and far between moments for yourself that keep you going from day to day.
Samantha Stroube-Daviss is a local columnist based in Corsicana. She may be reached by e-mail at email@example.com. Following Samantha’s blog at http://samantha-daviss.blogspot.com and on Twitter at @SamanthaDaviss1.